Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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