No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
