I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Sponge bath it is.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
