what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
