Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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