he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Randomize
