well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
You don't make any sense
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I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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