He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize