Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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