You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
