Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
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