C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize