at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
wow bdsm is so cute
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