google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Randomize
