I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
