this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
