these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.