No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
you guys were way drunker than both of me
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
No idea. I blame fireball.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina