Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
