okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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