I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize