It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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