Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
