I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
He had some BAD nuttage
It's like cleavage......... but different
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends