I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
