i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
as a side note pls kill me
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
