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• (415): View more from California

  Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.

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• (631): View more from New York

  She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (609): View more from New Jersey

  I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood

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• (850): View more from Florida

  hungover and i feel like a burrito

  (1-850): View more from Florida

  like eating one or like you are one?

  (850): View more from Florida

  like i am one.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex

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• (469): View more from Texas

  I'm going through a really dark time right now

  (214): View more from Texas

  I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up

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• (760): View more from California

  I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.

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• (315): View more from New York

  This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.

  (1-315): View more from New York

  Or maybe pay for Netflix?

  (315): View more from New York

  I'm not that desperate yet.

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