My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
