Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
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Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize