just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
