this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Just pee around me
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
