It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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