True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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