Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
