I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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