i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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