i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
