The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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