Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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