You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
