why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
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We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
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Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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