he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
