She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
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