idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize