Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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