make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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