Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
