yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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