I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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