I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize